THE CURE

We think we get over things.
We don’t “get over” things.
Or say, we get over the measles
but not a broken heart.
We need to make that distinction.
The things that become part of our experience
never become less a part of our experience.
How can I say it?
The way to “get over” a life is to die.
Short of that, you move with it,
let the pain be pain,
not in the hope that it will vanish
but in the faith that it will fit in,
find its place in the shape of things
and be then not any less pain but true to form.
Because anything natural has an inherent shape
and will flow towards it.
And a life is as natural as a leaf.
That’s what we’re looking for:
not the end of a thing but the shape of it.
Wisdom is seeing the shape of your life
without obliterating (getting over) a single instant.

~ Albert Huffstickler (Austin poet 1927-2002)

note from David - I was given this poem many years ago, found it and still do find it powerful. I sent it to my mentor, Dr. Fritz Smith and called him after a few days. I asked if he enjoyed the poem and he said,

“Poor person!”

I was surprised and asked what he meant. He said that he thought that “the things that become part of our experience” can indeed become totally cured, that we do “get over” things. Pains that have been part of our experience can be healed 100%.

I love his positive view, respect it and let it challenge me to this day. At the same time, I appreciate the perspective of the poet, that certain pains don’t disappear, but can find a true and natural place within our lives.

In this case I believe both views help inform and illuminate our relationship to pain.

Albert Huffstickler